10 phrases to say daily to your daughters to strengthen them and make them able to face the world
10 phrases to say daily to your daughters: Having girls is a beautiful combination of gifts and responsibilities. Gorgeous little girls offer us the chance to forge the deepest and truest female friendships for life, providing the next generation with strong, passionate and exuberant female spirits.
But it takes effort - no doubt.
The harmony between mothers and daughters and the ability to lead them (and make them listen to you!) is not done alone. It is a relationship that must be created and nurtured. Mutual respect can be taught from a young age, by empowering both mothers and daughters to feel that they belong in the family or the world.
Targeting this sense of belonging in our daughters is one of our most important tasks as parents. It's hard to teach our girls that they belong in a world that often sends them hostile messages, so we have to give them keys.
favourite girl
- As we look to our girls' development, we must empower them to:
- Starting to show their voice
- belief in themselves
- Defending what he believes in
- Rely on their desire to feel powerful
- loving themselves
- trust their intuition
- chasing their dreams
- Hold on to their position when they say “no”
- Be respectful and persevere in their stand against injustice
- Find peace in areas they feel require it
- Let their feelings guide them
- Trust their intuition that no is a good thing
- Always trust the good within them
- Let empathy guide them
- Freely using their hearts to bestow mercy
- Confidence that they can create any kind of life they choose
Consider using these phrases with your daughters to enable them to draw on the strength, kindness, vision and energy that they each have:
"I love you no matter what."
stay away from:
"Behave well today," or "If you behave well, I'll give you extra kisses tonight."
Alternative examples: “I want you to know that I love you no matter what. Whatever happens, you will always have my unconditional love.”
Explanation: Unconditional love is the essence of positive parenting and means that our love for our children does not depend on how well they behave. Raising unconditional love is essential to raising strong and confident girls. Rest assured that your daughters are doing well all the time, no matter what mistakes they make or the challenges they face every day.
Consolidating this fact in our girls helps them feel a sense of belonging, which is a key motivating factor. Dr Rudolf Drikors (The Godfather of Positive Education) helps us understand that a sense of belonging underlies children's behaviour. Don't let circumstances affect you and turn toward unconditional love, even in imperfect situations and difficult days or life stages.
Child's strengths
"You are really beautiful inside and out."
Stay away from: "You look so pretty in this dress."
Alternative examples: “I love you in this dress and you are really beautiful inside and out. Your heart is as beautiful as the princess gown you wear.” Explanation: The world will send messages to them that their beauty is based only on outer beauty, so let us remind them that true beauty is inner beauty. Self-confidence, kindness, positivity, empathy - are all qualities that express beauty from the heart.
Show your daughters female role models like Malala Yousafzai, Bethany Hamilton and the 2018 Olympic Women's Hockey Team, and explain how each of these women represents a profound beauty.
“You are strong and you can do this! I'm here to support.”
Stay away from: "I'm going to talk to that girl's mother, it's wrong for her to treat you like that."
Alternative examples: “You seem to dislike the way your classmate treats you. How are you going to let her know that you want her to be kind to you? You are strong and you can do it! And I'm here to support you."
Explanation: In order for our girls to feel empowered to solve their problems on their own, it is essential that we allow them to try. Resist the urge to do this for them, save them, or always give them the answer. Allow them to develop so that they can find the courage and seek to use that courage in their lives. Support them by standing by them, but allow them to use their voices to resolve conflicts peacefully and to be the initiators of change.
"How do you feel?"
Stay away from: "Oh don't cry... Simple dear, don't worry, it's all right."
Alternative examples: “How did you feel when that happened?” or “I see that your brother has upset you… How do you feel and how are you going to handle the matter in order to relieve yourself?”
Explanation: It is very important for our girls to feel and process emotions in order to develop their emotional capacities. It is important to realize as parents that there are no right or wrong emotions, only emotions. Teach your daughters that emotions are a good thing and that identifying how they are feeling will help them act with the goal of feeling better.
Telling our daughters that feelings of sadness, anger and hurt contribute to the fullness of life is important to help them accept all emotions. Resist the urge to fix what your girls are doing and expect some chaos.
“Oh my gosh, how I love __(part of my body)! What do you love most about your body?”
Stay away from: “Oh, I hate my stomach, I have to lose 2kg.”
Alternative examples: “Oh my God, I love my strong legs and how they have been shaped thanks to 15 years of surfing… They are my favourite part of my body. What is your favourite part of your body and why do you like it?
Explanation: Teaching our girls to focus on loving one thing about their bodies instead of telling them that they need to love every inch of themselves, will lessen their craving for a “perfect body image.” Allow your daughters to express their negative feelings about their bodies and resist the urge to make them feel wrong about those feelings. Instead, guide them to find one thing they like and motivate them to stick that thing in their minds.
"Oh Really? Tell me more.”
Steer clear of: “You should have done that,” or “Well, no wonder that happened, you shouldn't have _.”
Alternative examples
A: “Oh really? Tell me more. How do you feel? What did you do when your teacher said that? I'm here to listen to you..."
Explanation: When we develop a strong ability to listen intently to our daughters, it develops their ability to speak. This also allows them to express themselves freely and holistically, rather than being interrupted or needing help while speaking. When our daughters know that they have parents who will listen to them without trying to correct what they say, they will be free with their words, trust their words, express their feelings, and communicate effectively with us and the world.
“How will you be a beacon in this world?”
Stay away from: “Stop being mean. I refuse to raise a mean girl.”
Alternative examples: “Friendships with other girls can be very difficult. How will you be a beacon in this world and use your kindness to solve the problem?
Explanation: Girls' relationships with each other can become chaotic and difficult. Leave the word mean and replace it with showing what she really is - kind, good, loving, skilful, creative, considerate, and intelligent. Guide her to find creative ways to use these strengths to solve problems with her friends, colleagues, siblings, and you! It would always be nice if you could supplement these statements with a lesson on peaceful problem-solving.
Teach the children to take turns using this always-successful exercise by filling in the blanks in this sentence: “I feel __ and want to.”
“You have a strong desire to feel powerful, and that’s a good thing!”
Steer clear of: "Don't be bossy, nobody likes a bossy girl," or "Why can't you just listen? You always break the rules. what is wrong with you"?
Alternative examples: “God has given you a strong desire to feel strong and that will make you a great leader. But you have to practice doing it respectfully, let's try again.” Or, “You have such a strong desire to be in charge and that is a blessing! Can you try asking your buddies to play the way you prefer instead of telling them what to do?”
Explanation: “I want every little girl who's been told she's bossy to be told that she has leadership skills," Facebook CEO Sheryl Sandberg wrote in her book Lean In. What a blessing it is to instruct our girls on how their need for control is considered a good thing, rather than making them feel unattractive or bad. Encourage your daughters to find ways that they can feel empowered in a respectful way and ways that they can lead with integrity.
“How are you going to create the change you want to see?”
Stay away from: "Stop whining, they'll never change." Or, "These girls are mean, don't go with them."
Alternative examples: “I don't think you like these girls, what change would you like to see? How will you act with them in a way that makes them imitate you??
Explanation: Empowering your daughters to influence others with integrity gives them the ability to make positive changes in their peers, their school, their community, and even their families. Teaching our girls how to continue to act with kindness, compassion, self-confidence, determination, determination and respect - even when others are not - helps develop a strong personality and high self-esteem.
"I'm not comfortable with it," or "I want you to."
Stay away from: "You should stop," or "You should listen more to what I'm telling you."
Alternative examples: “I am not comfortable with you using your hands to solve your problems with your brother. I want you to hit the pause button, and use words to solve your problems with him in peace.”
Explanation: Using “I” statements to express their own choices, responsibilities, emotions, and desires will teach our girls to behave in the same way. It will also guide them to ask what they want (as opposed to telling others what they don't want), which will increase the cooperation of others with it.
Raising girls who use the word “I” to express their choices, dreams, and goals will help them create a future feminist generation that has less inclination to blame others, a generation that takes ownership of creating the life it wants (instead of waiting for others or external circumstances to make way).
These affirmative tips are things to watch out for in moms and daughters